Get Him Back
Nice Guys or Bad Boys?
Why Is he Distant?
Why He Doesn't Call
Why Men Leave
Christian Carter’s Mailbag - here is where you will
find all kinds of questions and answers, special
dating tips and relationship advice from Christian
Carter himself to the readers of his Catch Him and
Keep Him free newsletter. The mailbag is like a
newsletter, except in these specials editions,
Christian Carter addresses questions that his
readers send him for direct dating advice right from
Christian Carter’s mouth. So, choose your dating
topic, or start from How Do I get Him Back, and read
through them all! I will be adding more pages
weekly, so keep checking back!
First Impressions That Make Men Want More
If you've ever wondered about what draws a man in
to connect deeply with a woman early so he can't
help but want to see her again (for more than just a
fling) then keep reading...
I'm about to share secrets about meeting and
attracting great men that some women know but won't
tell you, or can't explain.
You're also about to hear insights into how
attraction, dating, and relationships honestly works
for men, and what to do about it.
Here we go...
Have you ever noticed that just talking to men for
the first time, getting to know each other, and
exchanging contact information can turn into some
kind of impossible puzzle or “game”?
And the more you think about it or about trying new
things, the more you just want to avoid the whole
It's frustrating and annoying, right?
Does it have to be so much work?
Can't we both just be ourselves and get past all the
tricks, games, etc.?
Well, the truth is, it doesn't have to be such an
ordeal and seem like such a game... if, and only if,
you know how attraction works for a man.
I'll repeat that.
It doesn't have to be a game IF, and only if, you
know how attraction works for HIM.
Notice that I didn't say how attraction works for
Have you ever thought about how attraction actually
works for men, and how it could be different than
how it works for you?
Well, then let me ask you...
Do you know what makes the difference between a man
flirting and perhaps feeling some “physical
attraction” for you, and a man that becomes almost
instantly connected and attracted to you on a deeper
physical AND emotional level?
I'll give you a minute to think about the
Got it yet?
The thing is, lots of women THINK they know how
things SHOULD WORK with men, but their idea or
“strategy” just hasn't seemed to work out so well in
their long, and sometimes disappointing,
And the crazier part is that most women never really
change their ideas or “strategies” on how they go
about finding and creating love, connection, and
commitment in their lives with men, even when they
just aren't working.
So what's the answer to the question from above
about what makes that difference?
I'll share the answer with you in just a minute, but
first I'd like to talk about HOW ATTRACTION WORKS
around first impressions and early on in the “casual
Then we'll look at the “deeper” kind of attraction a
man can feel for a woman and talk about some
specific “how-to's” that will instantly take your
love life to a more fun, resistance-free level as
you and a man get closer and closer.
CREATING A DEEPER LEVEL OF ATTRACTION AND A GREAT
IMPRESSION RIGHT FROM THE START
Have you had several relationships fall apart in the
past, the same way with different men?
And when it happened, did you start to think that
all men have a common set of problems or “issues”
that they can't see for themselves, let alone do
Well, if you recognize this, then odds are you've
also had that fear and doubt in the back of your
mind that there was also something wrong with YOU
here, not just with him.
And, unfortunately, you also blamed yourself for
some of HIS problems and shortcomings.
Ouch! Don't go to that negative place.
The truth is that you're not alone, and the good
news is that it doesn't take months or years of
therapy to find your own understanding of how things
really work with men, and to stop being so hard on
yourself about it.
And it doesn't take months of intense schooling or
training to change your love life for the better and
get back to that open, connected, loving place that
you know is there for you with a man.
Let's talk about how things often work in those
first encounters between men and women, and what's
going on underneath the surface here... because
first impressions are VERY IMPORTANT.
The short explanation is that men make almost
INSTANT JUDGMENTS about how they feel about a woman
right when they first meet them.
Everything that happens after a man has a first
impression of a woman logged in his mind gets
“filtered” through that impression, and it colors
almost everything he sees and feels.
So what impression are you making?
Do you know?
And what impression is the best one to make?
Let's start with the basics and look at the
situation early on when a man asks a woman for her
When this happens, for a man, it generally means one
of several things:
“I think you're interesting enough to see again and
find out if I could be attracted to you...” (not
feeling much attraction or connection yet, but
“I had a great time talking and I'd like to do it
again sometime...” (likes the conversation and
attention, but he doesn't “feel it” yet, even though
there's a “logical” or rational connection or bond
with things in common)
“I'm physically attracted to you, and I want to hook
up with you, but I haven't really thought about
anything else it might lead to or mean for me...”
(feeling just a physical attraction, with no
thoughts or conscious intentions beyond getting
“I feel attracted to you, and maybe “something
more”... so I want to see you again to explore these
feelings and find out what you're really all
about...” (feeling both a physical attraction AND a
Any of these look familiar in hindsight?
Well, for women who are in a place where they want a
real, loving, lasting relationship, it's important
to know what a man is thinking early on and where
he's already at from the start.
(And not finding this out is one of the biggest
mistakes that have women investing a ton of their
precious time and energy with a guy that has no
plans for having a deeper, loving, lasting
So... it sounds pretty important actually.
Here are some quick communication tips for you to
think about and use early on with men to help
identify the good guys from the ones that don't have
1. Don't Be Afraid To Ask Questions
So many times I hear women talk about how they don't
ever want to come off as needy, “bitchy”, pushy,
etc. with guys.
And often times, women will say something like, “I
don't want to scare him off...”
Two things are important to know here about asking
questions and finding out the “real deal” early on:
A. Only IMMATURE men who already have fears and
resistance to commitment and relationships will
actually get “scared off” IF a woman asks questions
in a mature, playful, and conversational way.
The upside here is that emotionally mature and open
guys will be drawn in, not pushed away.
In fact, direct questions, communicated in the right
way, are THE KEY to figuring out what kind of guy
you're dealing with - plus they provide you with all
kinds of answers about the man's real character and
mindset by his response.
But some women refuse to believe that men can
communicate on this open level because of their
I want you to go back to the sentence above about
immature men. And now I want you to notice the “IF”
“IF a woman asks questions in a MATURE... way.”
It makes all the difference.
So often we get caught up in our own perspective, or
dealing with and breaking through resistance and
fear, that we don't realize how much it affects our
own subtle communication. (Think body language,
voice tone and pattern, heart rate, etc.)
B. Context is EVERYTHING
Have you ever noticed that you can say almost
anything and have it mean almost anything, just by
changing the look on your face when you say it, the
tone of your voice, or the emotional state you're
It's fascinating to watch men and women communicate,
because most of the things we learn and identify
about each other happen through silent, indirect
But sometimes you don't get the whole story, right?
Exactly. So it's important to be able to ask
questions to find out what you need to know.
Like whether he's genuinely interested in you, or if
he's just a player looking for a quick connection...
and then he's “out.”
One great question I've heard women ask men is,
“What kind of woman do you respect?”
This not only challenges a man in a playful way, but
makes him think and will teach you a lot by how he
But remember, the CONTEXT of your communication is
the key... If you say that, and it's all about an
“agenda”, such as finding the love of your life in
your first meeting at a bar..., then I promise it's
not going to go over well.
(But you already knew that... wink wink)
On the flipside, if what you're indirectly and
silently communicating is that your questions are
about fun, learning, and most importantly - CREATING
ATTRACTION, then the man will keep FEELING that
connection to you, and respond in kind.
2. Learn What Actually CREATES ATTRACTION For HIM
There are several key “attitudes” and mindsets that
men are naturally and magnetically drawn to and seek
out in women that they like to spend their time
When men interact with a woman and they see and FEEL
these attitudes and “ways of being”, they become
instantly attracted... and often don't even know
In fact, many times they can't help but want to
commit to something more serious with these women,
even if they didn't consciously want more coming
into the relationship.
Let me share with you one of the secrets of how
ATTRACTION works for men...
One of the most undeniably attractive attitudes or
qualities for men is when a woman is UNPREDICTABLE.
I don't mean unpredictable in that she might lose
control emotionally and get irritated, upset,
frustrated, etc. with him or with anyone else around
No. That would actually be a turn-OFF for most
The unpredictability I'm talking about is being
playful, challenging, and creating intrigue.
A great example is when a man asks, “So, what do you
Here's the boring, PREDICTABLE response that might
seem very “nice” and appropriate, but doesn't create
attraction - “I'm an accountant and I run
spreadsheets to calculate P&L.”
Or, “I do PR, and I work with so and so clients who
had me create a campaign about blah blah blah...”
But wait... these are interesting things about you
as a person that someone should know about and
Yes, but guess what?
Predictable responses make for great conversation to
get to know each other - if you want to be great
And yes, your career might be great and say
important things about you, but you've got to
realize that it doesn't make a man FEEL ATTRACTION
Just like it's not a man's career that makes him
attractive... it's his personality, the chemistry
you share, and WHY he does the things he does.
Following me here?
So instead, find a way to keep him guessing... Tell
him some made up career that's ridiculous, silly,
obviously untrue, and lets him know you're having
fun with him.
(And in case you don't realize it, men will have
much more fun trying to guess and think about what
you really do, rather then just hearing it from you
For example, if you're at a bar, tell him “I'm a
social scientist doing research here to uncover how
'beer-goggles' really work on men.”
And then you say, with a wry smile on your face as
you look at him in a playful and fake suspicious
way, “How many drinks have YOU had?”
Guess what? A guy will know exactly what you're
doing and jump into the fun with you... and he'll
probably even make up a silly joke career of his own
to kind of challenge you back and take things up a
And now you've got a fun, engaging connection...
instead of a predictable, emotionally unengaging,
and rational conversation about your real jobs.
There's plenty of time later to get to those things
by the way and cover the predictable life stuff. But
if a man doesn't FEEL ATTRACTION from the start, on
a deep emotional level, then everything else will be
more difficult and move slowly (if at all) with him.
Create the attraction first, and everything else
HOW TO CREATE A DEEP EMOTIONAL CONNECTION AND
LASTING ATTRACTION WITH A MAN
So I've given you some quick tips on how attraction
works, and some basic “how-to's” to think about for
first impressions and early on.
But we've just touched the tip of the iceberg about
how men really think and feel when it comes to
This is by no means all “the goods.”
Which leads me to the question from earlier about
what makes the difference between a man that is
interested in a woman, but it probably won't go
further than some physical connection, and a man
that feels a deep emotional connection and
attraction for a woman and wants to be with her?
Well, most women learn at a relatively early age
that men can experience just a physical attraction
for a woman, and to not confuse this with something
So what is that “something more” than Physical
In my ebook, “Catch Him & Keep Him”, I explain in
detail what that “something more” is. (Click
here to get it and start reading now.)
It's what I call “Intellectual Attraction” and it's
that feeling a man has for a woman that will have
him court and pursue HER and lead HER into a
committed, loving relationship.
The entire first section of my ebook, “Inside
The Mind Of A Man”, will give you a clear
understanding of how men really and truly think
about women, dating, and relationships.
You'll have a fresh perspective on how to improve
your love life just by reading this section and
understanding more about what's really going on with
I spell out the common places where challenges,
resistance, and confusion arises in men when they're
in relationships, and show you how to think about it
differently and be able to avoid the resistance most
other women run into again and again with men.
I've also devoted an entire section to the specific
communication and behaviors that naturally create a
deeper, more emotional connection with a man.
The last thing to remember is that you shouldn't do
all “the work” in a relationship just to try and
make things good with a man.
If you learn how to create a deeper connection with
a man and have him feeling more than just physical
attraction, then he'll be more open, sharing and
easy to talk to, and make things better for you
So don't stay stuck in the same old patterns and
strategies that haven't completely served you well
Take the next easy step towards your new improved
love life where connection and growth won't just
come from your “hard work”, but from the man feeling
so attached and “into” you that he'll be leading you
If you're not completely sure if the book is really
going to change your love life for the better, then
I've got good news for you...
I'll let you try my ebook out risk-free. If
you do not like it, ask for a refund and get it -
hassle free, no strings.
If you don't like it, just let me know and you won't
pay a thing - no questions asked. And you can even
keep the ebook.
If you like it, keep it, read it, and watch your
love life take off and become more fun and
effortless than you might have ever imagined it
So what are you waiting for?
Go get it right now:
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