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Relationship Advice: How to Have
Relationship Success
Here is another great newsletter from the mailbag
of Christian Carter. Check it out because he gives
some truly great dating advice here, as usual.
****Email From A Catch Him and Keep Him Reader****
Christian - you are wonderful and so are your
programs. I became engaged on Dec. 17th and I have a
great big diamond ring to show for it.
Ha!
I recently listened to your Casual to Committed
disks again and they are still helping me navigate
the world of men as we try to decide on a wedding
date. He keeps telling me I bewitched him because he
can't believe his own behavior or feelings. He feels
I am very different from all of the women he has
ever been involved with. I use ideas and make
comments from your programs and my fiancée' thinks
I'm extremely smart. This is a dream come true for
me and I am so happy.
I started reading your stuff in June of 2006 after a
man I had been in love with just cut off all
communication and sort of disappeared. I was
devastated. I printed your eBook and listened to
your interviews. Thirteen days later my fiancée'
started writing to me from a dating site and I knew
just how to handle the entire dating situation this
time.
He actually proposed in August of 2006, but of
course I told him no because I was going to date for
a while longer having just been out of another
relationship. Well, he really started pursuing me
then and before I knew it he had me (and I had him).
He gleefully told me I hooked him and then would
wonder out loud how I did it since he had been
dating a long time and had always dated 'airheads
and bimbos'. But I'm now considered sexy and fun and
mysterious!! ME!!!
Thanks so much. My fiancée' and I are in our fifties
and both of us had very long, very unhappy
marriages. We are ecstatic to be so well matched and
'know' how to find our way through the commitment
process with both of us feeling really good about
it. I think without the help of 'Catch Him and Keep
Him' I would have made the same dating mistakes I
made with the first man (and my ex-husband) and
would have been crying and scratching my head as to
why another relationship dissolved. Your programs
and your staff you work with made all the
difference.
Truly I feel like a miracle has happened for me. I
feel feminine and sexy and I never did before.
Thanks again.
K.R.
>>>>Christian Carter's Comments:
You've made some great points here...
The first being, if you find that you "fail" or get
hurt in a relationship with a man, you don't have to
take it to mean that there's something wrong with
YOU.
Unfortunately, lots of women worry endlessly about
what might be wrong with them when things suddenly
fall apart with the man they are dating.
And some women NEVER find a way to recover from this
and get back to a healthy and happy emotional place
in their lives... which ends up getting in the way
of creating something better in the future with
another man.
Instead of worrying and letting all kinds of false
and negative beliefs take over your mind and
"infect" the way you think and feel... you can
decide to find and learn what actually works with
men and dating and start having new and better
experiences.
"Success" if you will.
And you can do this almost immediately if you want
to - if you find the right things to learn and start
doing differently.
But what's more subtle but fascinating that you
pointed out is this-
When you "know" how things work with a man, what
might be coming next, and how to deal with it... all
of a sudden EVERYTHING feels EASY. There aren't any
surprises, shocks, or scary bumps in the road. And
you can handle pretty much anything thrown at you
and come out on the other side smelling like roses.
Next thing you know a man is begging YOU for a
commitment (or even marriage in your case), instead
of you begging and chasing him.
On the other hand, when you don't know how things
work with a man, everything that happens can feel
like it's the start of a new disaster and you end up
anxious and worried all the time- which is NOT
something that makes a man want to get closer to you
or date you for any length of time.
Congratulations on your engagement, and keep it up
in your relationship.
As you learned in my "From Casual To Committed"
program, even a marriage proposal is just another
level of commitment... and if you want to keep your
relationship ALIVE and GROWING and producing
ATTRACTION then you need to understand that you'll
both continue to move into even higher levels of
commitment with each other.
And like every man, his natural response when you
arrive at new levels of commitment will be for him
to RESIST you and your relationship.
Don't let this frustrate or confuse you in case you
thought that becoming engaged meant that he wouldn't
ever act this way again. This isn't how men work.
But now you know what to do about it. Keep using
what I've taught you about how men think about
relationships and commitment, and how ATTRACTION is
one of the very quickest and easiest ways to keep
you both growing closer. No matter how long you've
been together and no matter how committed you
already are.
****Email From A Catch Him and Keep Him Reader
Dear Christian,
To make a long story as short, reading your words
has helped me get to know the truth from a man's
perspective, which I guess I knew but was in denial
over, and I didn't want to face the truth!! But it
has helped me enormously. Kind of a 'pull yourself
together girl!'
YOU ARE WORTH MORE than the humiliation you keep
putting yourself through from chasing or dating
'un-available guys'.
I've had a kind of re-affirmation and revelation
about where my relationship really is, despite
everyone else telling me it was fine and wanting me
to put my head in the sand just because it was great
sometimes, we had fantastic sex, but it was lacking
in the level of commitment and caring I desire. Plus
it gets me upset and mad!!!
Thanks for writing your Catch Him and Keep Him
eBook. I would recommend reading Catch Him and Keep
Him to any heart broken girl who wants her life back
on track... with him OR without him!!!
Thanks very much
S.S. xxxx
>>>>Christian Carter's Response:
You said something that I hear from TONS of women
who read my Catch Him and Keep Him eBook and write
me...
It's that you've really had the "realities" of how
men are driven home for you... and you also have a
new attitude and perspective about yourself and what
you deserve and will tolerate. That's great, but
it's not enough. And I care enough to be really
honest with you about it.
Here's the thing...
There's a kind of "process" lots of women who read
my stuff and quickly have a "breakthrough" go
through that keeps them from making their love lives
as amazing as they can be. It goes roughly like
this-
Step 1: Doubting that anyone can help them -
especially some strange random guy online. J
Step 2: Reading enough of my newsletters that they
realize, "Hey, this guy might actually know
something that could help me."
Step 3: Buying and reading my Catch Him and Keep Him
eBook, and having a feeling of RELIEF and
transformation as they see the things they couldn't
understand before or clarify about men, dating, and
relationships.
Step 4: Thinking that this one "Aha!" they've had is
going to change everything. But then they go out and
still do the things they have always been doing,
thinking that their new understanding is somehow
going to magically create a new result from the same
behavior.
Step 5: Realizing that simply recognizing something
mean you know how to DO IT yourself, and that it
might take some adjustment to your own behavior to
change the way things turn out with men.
There's a "next step" for you here...
You need to take the specific things that I teach
you to DO and SAY with men in my eBook... and then
start actually DOING THEM.
The best place to start is by working on how
ATTRACTION is created inside a man. Use all the
things I explain such as conversational tips, body
language, and what makes a woman "cool" in a man's
mind to do this and get started. Then, when you find
a great guy who you really connect with and would
want to start a more serious relationship with...
make sure you think about triggering what I call in
my eBook his "Honest Woman Response".
Remember this comes from the old saying, "to make an
honest woman of her". (Which basically means to
treat a woman well, care for her, and give her your
respect and loyalty) Here's why I bring up this up
specifically...
The reality is that since you've had to have your
own personal realization about your "self-worth"...
it's very likely that you've been carrying around
some negative beliefs about yourself and your
relationships with men inside you. And this has
taught men to see you the way they do. In other
words, the way you have been seeing and thinking of
yourself has been the way men have ended up treating
you.
"Unworthy."
If you want a man to meet you and know that you're
the kind of woman to love, cherish, and RESPECT,
then it's a good idea to make sure you know how to
COMMUNICATE to him that you know your own self-worth
from the very beginning, and that you'll accept
nothing less from him. So go back and re-read the
section on the "Honest Woman Response" and start
DOING those things I talk about that trigger a man's
"Honest Woman Response". The good news is that
you've done the hard part - having the "mental
shift" in your own mind.
Now put it to use with the dating tips I've given
you and keep it up until the man you're with is so
wild for you he's about to go crazy not being able
to eat or sleep because he's thinking about you all
the time.
Now, if you're ready to enjoy the joy and affection
that comes from knowing how to create a deep level
of ATTRACTION inside a man that will LAST and keep
him coming back for more in your relationships...
it's time for you to get yourself a copy of my
"Natural & Lasting Attraction" CD/DVD program.
And if you're reading this right now, and you
haven't downloaded my online eBook, you need to go
and do that RIGHT NOW. You can download it and
literally be reading it in a few minutes.
Go download it
here.
I'll talk to you again soon, and best of luck in
Life and Love.
Your Friend,
Christian Carter
©Copyright 2006, Catch Him Inc. All
Rights Reserved. Copyright materials used by
permission. “Catch Him And Keep Him” and “Christian
Carter” are trademarks of Catch Him Inc. |
